FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
February 7, 2013
Mobile, Ala. — Red Square Agency is announcing that they are shocked and offended by a video report published on Feb. 6 by The Onion titled "PR Firm Advises U.S. To Cut Ties With Alabama.”
Red Square Agency stated, “This is the newspaper that gave us such unforgettable headlines as ‘CIA Realizes It’s Been Using Black Highlighters All These Years,’ ‘Osprey Devours Lion in Massive Food-Chain Shake-Up’ and ‘Wealthy Teen Nearly Experiences Consequence.’”
While the fake video highlighted various made-up public opinion polls about Alabama, this and the contention that it should split from the United States is not what offended the Mobile, Ala.-based ad agency. “We were just surprised to see a decades-old joke on the front page of The Onion.” At press time, the video has been liked 502 times on Facebook and shared 280 times on Twitter. Red Square Agency cited this as proof that the nation was in agreement that the world-renowned satirical newspaper was capable of better, like its Sept. 10, 2007, article, “Pitchfork Gives Music 6.8,” which has been liked 22,400 times on Facebook and shared 1,900 times on Twitter.
“Really? In The Onion? We’re just shocked,” Red Square Agency added breathlessly, noting that it had shuttered plans to retaliate against the Wisconsin-founded satirical newspaper with a cheese joke.
At press time, Red Square Agency could be found staring sentimentally at an issue of The Onion with the headline, “Study: Dolphins Not So Intelligent On Land.”
Red Square Agency
Sarah Jones, president